How To Stop People-Pleasing
People-pleasing can lead to negative consequences for your relationships, health, and overall well-being. It's important to recognise the downsides and work towards developing healthy boundaries and a strong sense of self.
Generally, people-pleasing behaviours are more common in women than in men and people-pleasers often go to great lengths to avoid conflict. Not only that, they frequently put other people's needs first at the expense of their own. [Source: YouGovAmerica]
Stopping people-pleasing is possible with self-awareness, thought shifts and self-compassion.
Here are some tips that may help you:
1. Identify why you people-please
Understanding the root cause of your people-pleasing behaviour is the first step in changing it. It may stem from a fear of rejection, a desire for validation, or a need to feel in control. Reflect on why you feel the need to please others.
2. Set boundaries
Learn to say no when you don't want to do something, or when it is not in your best interest. It's important to communicate your boundaries clearly and stick to them.
If you would like to dive deeper into setting healthy boundaries, make sure to watch my free 1-hour webinar replay “Set Healthy Boundaries Without Feeling Selfish, Mean Or Unkind”.
3. Practice self-care
Taking care of yourself is essential to breaking the cycle of people-pleasing. Make time for activities that make you happy and prioritise your well-being.
4. Challenge your thoughts
People-pleasers often have a distorted view of themselves and their worth. Challenge negative self-talk and work on developing a more positive self-image.
5. Seek support
Working with a life coach like me can help you identify and overcome people-pleasing behaviour. I can also offer guidance and support as you work towards creating healthy boundaries.
Remember, breaking the habit of people-pleasing is time and effort well spent for the positive end results in your sense of self and well-being. Be patient and kind to yourself as you work towards a more boundaried and fulfilling life.
If you think you could benefit from working with a life coach like me, I offer a free, no-strings consult to explore working together.
Carola Moon is on a mission to help ambitious and capable women succeed in those life situations where their brains tell them they don't have what it takes to cope. Carola is the women's clarity coach, busting her client's wonky thoughts about who they are and helping them create the impactful lives they crave. She believes it’s indeed possible to have your cake and eat it!
She has a master's degree (MA) in sociology and psychology, is a certified Co-Active Coach (CPCC) located in South Oxfordshire, UK, and works with her clients worldwide. Do you think you’ll benefit from working with Carola? Book a consult to find out.